I look at my friends who are happy, and it makes me feel weak. But when I go for help I am not weak, I am strong.
Anger, Stress & How to Cope
Tuesday, November 19, 2013Have you ever found yourself taking out your anger or frustration on a friend or loved one who has absolutely nothing to do with the reason you're upset? We've all been there, and psychologists even have a name for this behaviour: they called it "displaced aggression."
Often, when we feel powerless about a situation, we dump our anger on another person – someone we know won’t fight back. It isn’t nice and it isn’t fair, but there are ways to deal with it and prevent it from happening.
Martha Beck recently wrote an article for the Huffington Post called “How to Stop Taking Your Anger Out On Others” and it contains some great nuggets of wisdom about taming displaced aggression. One tip we really like is to ask yourself the following questions when you start to feel angry, upset and out of control:
1. What’s really bothering me?
2. What’s the worst thing about that?
3. What’s the worst thing about that?
4. Repeat question 3 until you reach the source of your distress.
Once you pinpoint exactly what it is that’s causing you pain and distress you can start to seek help and problem solve – and then you can start to feel better. You can read the complete article at the Huffington Post website.
If you feel like you need some help dealing with feelings of anger, contact us at Nexus Youth Services to see a counsellor. You can also visit the Tangerine Walk-In Clinic or simply stop by the Nexus Youth Centre if you need someone to talk to. We are here for you, with you!
Photo by f1uffster (Jeanie).